3 weeks...Really?

 

I find it hard to believe that this little poppet has only been on the outside world with us for three weeks - it feels like so much longer!

I will write a dedicated post about little B on Friday - today I want to talk about my own battle with self sabotage.

It is something that I continually seem to battle with for whatever reason.

I start out with the best of intentions and then that inner voice wins out on me and the self sabotage monster comes out.

For example - earlier this week I decided to give some structure and planning to my meals - so I set about writing out a planned meals list for the week ahead - all with the best of intentions. 

The very next day I woke up and decided that I would much rather sooth my anxiety with Maccas. So I set to thinking about this course of action a little bit - I needed to figure out what part of my thinking process was letting me down. 

I came to the conclusion that it was nothing at all to do with the food choices I was making - I wasn't necessarily craving Maccas or anything else junky - it was the spending of money and the concept of missing out on a 'treat' that I was missing/craving. 

So I thought about it a little bit more and decided that it was self limiting beliefs about spending that was contributing to the self sabotage. I didn't have to miss out on my daily indulgence and 'break from the mundane-ness of motherhood' that is my skinny decaf cappuccino (I know - why do I even bother!). One cappucino a day wasn't going to kill me or stop me from losing weight (it didn't last time). In fact I'm not even really eating in a majorly restricted fashion - just cutting back on a few 'habits' that have crept up over the past 9 months. I am totally taking the 80/20 approach - eating clean and healthy 80% of the time and cutting out all the 'sometimes foods' that had made their way into my diet as everyday foods. That doesn't stop me from buying a nice fruit salad or fresh juice! It just restricts me to coffee only at the cafe - rather than coffee and cake.

Now I just have to circumvent the little problem of H boy wanting to eat part of whatever I am eating - it makes portioning difficult because I have to serve myself extra to counterbalance the fact that he is going to want some of mine but then you never can tell just how much he is going to want.

The other thing I am taking the time to do is remind myself how great clean and healthy eating makes me feel and taking it one meal at a time - oh and don't forget the planning - it is still there - I'm just not being quite sooo rigid!

I have set myself a mini goal of 3 weeks to begin with - as you know how the saying goes - it takes 21 days to form a habit. I am hoping that in 3 weeks time I will have forgotton about the daily treats and be satisfied with how I am eating the 80/20 way.